What if Brett purifies himself in the waters of Lake Minnetonka?

It sure as hell ain't no Superbowl Shuffle.

Oh, Marcus. What are you trying to do, scare me? You sound like my mother. We've known each other for a long time. I don't believe in magic, a lot of superstitious hocus pocus. I'm going after a find of incredible historical significance, you're talking about the boogie man. Besides, you know what a cautious fellow I…

Where can I purchase the lycra bodysuit that makes me sparkle just so when the moonlight hits me? I hear that chicks love that shit.

Step 16: Slip out the back, Jack
Step 17: Make a new plan, Stan
Step 18: You don't need to be coy, Roy
Step 19: Just listen to me

Breaking News

Apparently the Golden Globe voters haven't either.

Coco is our Prometheus — but that's all. Coco keeps emphazing this. Thou art God, I am God, he is God — all that groks. Coco is a man like the rest of us. A superior man admittedly — a Leno taught the things the Carsons know, might have set himself up as a pipsqueak god. Coco is above that temptation. Prometheus… but…

Zooey Deschanel
Sam Rockwell
Mos Def
Paul Rudd

Out in the Atlantic is George Clooney.

Aziz LIGHT!

The math is simple:

You want better ratings?

Snuggie, Special Victim's Unit has a nice ring to it.

I want video coverage of the AVN awards. In fact, if you need a correspondent to cover them just let me know.

We'd all be better off if the rest of the world just learned to speak American.

Trust me on this. The setting will be moved to southern California where Ray and Egon are hosting a Mythbusters-type show on cable. Venkman will living comfortably with his wife Dana and her son while hosting a successful reality TV series based on his "The World of the Psychic" show from GB II and his experiments…

Subcreatures! Gozer the Gozerian, Gozer the Destructor, the Traveler, has come. Choose and perish.

The fourth brother is actually a sister.

I'm more of a