Wise of them, really.

Archmage, I think you owe us all an explanation.

"American seed?" AC/DC's lawyers have sent a cease and desist notice to you and Phil Rudd has sent the customary death threat.

He's coming to your town, he likes to party down.

Big, nasty claws on the little fuckers, as well.

Wow! He IS Crooked!

Glove Slap, I Don't Take Crap!

Well, that's why they're called rookie mistakes.

Rat-arsed was also available.

Frankly, this cat sounds like he's on the Autism Spectrum somewhere.

[Social Distortion's Story Of My Life starts playing in the background]

Lots from Columns A and B!

What's this about Distressed Balls? Yes, time and gravity can be very cruel…

You're already doing way better than I ever have. I'm more of a Scorched Earth kind of guy who holds a grudge longer than God, because I'm more than a bit of a bastard.
On the other hand, I've been married for sixteen years and I was a lot younger then. I'm trying to be a better person every day.

DON'T ASK DUFF MAN WHY HIS DAUGHTER DROPPED OUT OF COLLEGE!
IT'S… TOO SAD.

[Lays down a trail of pieces of candy into a U-shaped Claymore mine array in a blind alley]

You take back that stuff about corned beef or you skin that smoke wagon and see what happens, Mister! ;-)

Well, disappointingly, it's by a bunch of Canadians, so that's a non-starter right there…

[Capers in an Ernest T. Bass manner, hoping to get some money out of you big-city assholes before I leave town]

You have to admit that curling is more interesting than The Pro-Bowlers' Tour or any sort of televised golf. Now that I understand the rules and scoring, I like watching curling, and it's not as sleep-inducing as the aforementioned sports.