It's to indicate that she's into zoophilia. Her next project is "Dogfucker," written and directed by M. Night Shyamalan. (SPOILER: The dog is the werewolf form of her ex-husband, revealed after Deschanel's shame-filled and emotionally shattered character kills herself and her canine lover with a silver sword, in a…

But you're married! Oh, yeah: So am I.

The Walkmen
At the risk of revealing that I'm not, in fact, a know-it-all hipster, I admit that I'd never heard of The Walkmen until I read the AVC review of "You & Me." I bought the album on the basis of that "A" review, as well as the cover art, since I just had my heart broken by a girl who fancied dressing like a…

How about Miracle Whip? Or are you just across-the-board opposed to such a spread?

Spoiler: Mayonnaise is the ending of Richard Brautigan's "Trout Fishing In America."

I like that the poster designer made a conscious decision to have the focal point framed by a pair of feet that look as gnarled as the roots of an oak tree. Nice.

Sloane Crosley? Not this again!

Siiiiigh
I'm a longtime Kozelek fan, but listening to his last album, "April," I've sometimes wanted to take the disc out of the player and throw it like a mini frisbee, having no patience for his mopey meandering. It wouldn't surprise me if he's had to wipe drool off of his guitar after performing some of his…

When I saw the inventory topic, I was sure "The Public Burning" would be part of the list. Ah, well. Anyway, right now I'm compiling my own list for the WebMD symptomchecker, and it does include "pubic burning."

I used to like Oliver Platt in a bunch of stuff. Then I realized it was actually Robbie Coltrane.

Travis, it's also just fun to bellow, "Let's see some hustle!" And when he plays baseball, I like to yell at him to "put some sass in it," which gets gratifyingly confused looks from everyone.

My stepson is a talented drummer, but not a talented athlete, although I'm proud that he enthusiastically tries out for various sports. Still, if he does anything on a football field that contributes toward a scholarship, it'll be as a drum major, not as a football player. But you can't tell his dad that.

Strike that "no."

I've given up pretending to like any sports, although I played just about every sport in high school. Even then, I had a hard time getting past my "Come on, it's just a game" attitude, and it's pretty much impossible now. My stepson plays baseball and football, and some of the parents take it so seriously; when they…

Aw. My wife inscribed my wedding band with a quote from "Goonies": "It's wet, ain't it?"

It's a bonus that the actor, Roger Allam, who plays the pugnacious Anglo landlord, looks remarkably like Christopher Hitchens.

I haven't had much of a desire to see that film, but I do now. Sometimes it's an inspired supporting role from a character actor that makes a movie for me, and I'm a big Ray Wise fan, so I'll definitely check it out.

I, too, have never seen "The Wire," and I am amazed by all the hype. However, I have seen that episode of "Ace of Cakes" where they make a cake for a "Wire" charity event, so I'm familiar with the show.

I prefer "Rob Roy" to "Braveheart" — both the movie and the cocktail.

I've long wanted to start watching "Buffy," as well as "Battlestar Galactica," "The Sopranos," "The Wire," et al., but I'm going to turn 31, I have a wife and family, I have a lousy job, I haven't accomplished anything, blah blah blah. I barely have enough time get to the gym after a miserable workday, make dinner,…