Someday I'm gonna ache like this old bastard aches.

I was clarifying.

Wow. Internet, huh?

Well, let's face it
If MTV is going to removing anything that could be considered "a crime" and "obviously extremely disturbing" from their programming, they'd have to take themselves right the fuck off the air altogether.

Lamenting
the fact that The Blind Side was only knocked to #2.

Thank you, gentlemen. I'm going to go back to not chronically masturbating now.

Streets of Fire is problematic because Amy Madigan is simply not believable as a lesbian.

The Huey Lewis passage from American Psycho.

Someone register as COCKNAVEL.

I can tell you after years of painstaking, and painful, research, Winona Ryder has never shown her boobs. There's the silhouette side boob in Dracula, and there's that knee-weakening Rolling Stone cover from way back, but that's as good as it gets.

I just watched All of Me for the first time in years, about a month ago. He does gat a lifetime pass.

Don't forget The Beatles.

So, no problem
Just throw in an ass-to-ass scene with Meryl. Then they can give it a nice PG-13 rating.

It doesn't take a genius to figure that out, monkey dick.

What will stop me from marrying a pug? Madness!!

I like their owls.

Well, someone has to write his name on the album covers, so he'll probably get that guy.

WHAT ABOUT GATOR 7 WHAT ABOUT GATOR 7??!!??!!

"Globophobia." Holy fuck it's actually a real thing.

"I will show you the tears, fears, and sweat"
Will he show us the piss?