Sure, you were joking about Al Gore inventing the internet.  But, seriously Sean, what's with all the Ayn Rand love?

I'd take Bush over this wench any day of the week.  The President or the band.  Or the band with W as lead singer.  I'd also take Kate Bush's bush.  1970s Kate Bush, that is.  It's probably a bit dry now.

I hope that Tyler Perry plays Eazy-E and dies of AIDS.

You can make a great drinking game out of Friedman columns.  A shot for each mixed metaphor.  A shot for everytime he throws out Skype, Twitter, or Facebook as a buzzword without really explaining why he's doing it. A shot every time he mentions a chatty cab driver in Istanbul or somewhere who for some reason gives…

I wish I could drink on the job…

I like him, but his whining about being 'fired' for his 9/11 comments is the biggest piece of bullshit.  Besides the fact that he wasn't fired until months later when his ratings tanked, he wasn't solely targeted as he claimed.

I would sit through Elizabethtown a good 500 times to see the rest of the pictures on her iPhone.

When I was a kid, I thought he was saying 'decrease the circus population'.  I was a very stupid child.

Little known fact: Stevie Ray Vaughn was in that helicopter.

And it looks like Roman Polanski is busy putting finishing touches on his new masterpiece, 13-Year-Old Pink Assholes.

Dude, the motherfucker used live ammunition on the set.  Spielberg still won't speak to him because of it.  Besides, intentional killing isn't the point here.  The courts call it negligent homicide and he somehow bought his way out of jail with that one.

I like his movies and all, but he still killed three people and still won't apologize.  That's kind of a dick move, to say the least.

Devil: Would you like to win an Oscar?

You're from Canada, so your opinion means nothing.  Everyone knows that.

He also has a 'Dorian Gray' thing going on.

The Stonecutters.  Duh.

Hmmm-Hmmm!  I've been waiting all week for Generic Jason Sudeikis Comedy #456E.

Leia: I love you.

Fucking esprit d'escalier.

Or replacing his brain with a casserole of ammunition.