David Schwimmer renders your argument invalid.

Late night talks shows are also good as background noise and light source for late night sex.

It's like Comic Sans, but less funny.

Ferguson… ugh. I don't find anything about him likable. And after my recent 7-night cruise on Royal Caribbean, I don't want to ever see his face again. (One of the channels on the TV in our cabin basically was just 24/7 Ferguson. He apparently has some kind of deal to shill for Royal Caribbean.)

My fiance and I have had this same conversation. We hated him on SNL and his movies were terrible. But we like his late-night stuff, especially his musical parodies, which he seems to have a real talent for. And we think part of his appeal is that he's got a knack for tapping into the things that 30-somethings love…

Sleigh bells have nothing to do with Christmas in the same way that this song has nothing to do with music.

Why call yourselves "Sleigh Bells" if you're not making Christmas music?

Wow, that first sentence was a doozy! By the time I got to "we hope we never have to see it", I had to go back and re-read it to figure out what that meant.

" In the moonlight opposite me were three young
women, ladies by their dress and manner. I thought at the time that I
must be dreaming when I saw them, they threw no shadow on the floor.
They came close to me, and looked at me for some time, and then
whispered together. Two were dark, and had high aquiline noses, like
the…

Then maybe you should read it again. It's not overtly sexy, but it definitely has sexy undertones. The Count had a sort of harem of female vampires, and he liked to prey on young women.

"Sex addiction" is a fictitious addiction used as an excuse by guys who get caught cheating. All men are addicted to sex because our DNA compels us to procreate.

I got your joyful noise right here: *farts*

I'm confused by that ad. I think it's for a weight-loss program, but it just reminds the audience that she achieved success and fame BEFORE losing the weight. So the message is "You don't really need our product."

As a heterosexual male, I couldn't care less about Katherine Heigl, what color her hair is, or anything she does.

This movie is totally unrealistic because in real life people never use cliched expressions like that.

Boys today are masturbating to pictures of Justin Beiber, not Miley Cyrus.

Is there a scene where Tintin visits the Congo to bring civility and Christianity to the stupid negroes? If not, I'm not interested.

Who says you can't go back? (Am I doing it right?)

For shame, Ashton. Quit picking on celebrities. Didn't you learn ANYTHING from H8TR?

If they made a porn about my sex life, it would be called "LOST".