"to bring squad goals hashtag to sitcom life" Those words all look familiar, yet make no sense. The headline might as well be "Purple monkey dishwasher."

"imitating the braces-impaired speech of the Shelley character from South Park" What? They're not even similar.

Well fuck, I always like that song, but now I'm wondering if I'm just under their Swedish Mind Control? (Note to self: "Swedish Mind Control" would be a great band name.)

*Spike Lee tweets Edward Norton's home address*

Bill Cosby: Beyond the Pale. It has a nice ring to it.

Calling it "victim-blaming bullshit" assumes that she's a victim, meaning you've already declared him guilty. Maybe she's not a victim and her accusations are bullshit.

Starfishwipe

Everyone has their price. Surely there's SOME number of layers of irony you could wrap it in to make it palatable. What about… six layers?

Why not just a drama that focuses on the jurors? I think that would be interesting, and I don't think it's been done before.

There's a Polish joke in there somewhere too.

Looks like she had some plastic surgery.

What did she do to her face?

ASS BURGERS

"So it'll be like 'A Beautiful Mind' except… younger. We'll youthify it 75% and tween it up 50%."

Oh boy, wait till you see the Rachel Dolezal gerbil!

The Featured Pet of the Month is "Chad Chalmers"

I don't think #9, #8, or #2 should be called horror movies.

Yeah, because the sci-fi classic 2001: A Space Odyssey is a perfect fit for American HORROR STORY.

"[Mongrel Media] should be proud of the role [they're] playing in cinema culture." - A.A. Dowd, The A.V. Club

I'd keep her in a chicken coop in the backyard and force to cough up a few eggs every morning.