I just checked out all of these suggestions on lala. The Big Electron gets the brass ring. High on Fire is the closest to the sweet spot for me. (Reminds me of Prong, only better). Down is awesome. I used to listen to a lot of Pantera; not sure how I missed this. I liked CoC back in the day, but it hasn't aged too…

Snap! The way you burned me on a self-disclosure is masterful, AAC. You're the tops!

Am I Metal?
I love metal, but here's the catch: I've never found a band/album that I truly loved. The closest thing was Sevendust's "Home," but they completely ruined their credibility by putting out 6 subsequent albums of the most repugnant schlock imaginable. "Home" chunks the fuck out, though. Goddamn, it gets me…

Here comes the fun cooker!

We need a name that's witty at first, but that seems less funny each time you hear it.

Tits McGee is right.

I totally believe in dragons now.

Kill Bill: Port of Call Bangkok Dangerous

Wow! You admit to the AV Club that you saw Van Hagar?!? During the "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge" Tour?

Another zero…

Well, Swibble, your mother and I were planning to tell you when you got older.

Swibble, I knew that would happen. An early draft included the words "our respective parents," but there's no way to use the word "respective" without sounding like a wonky douche, so it was excised from the final version. I'm open to suggestions.

I'm with Schiels, Sheltie, and Lobo Tommy. My wife and I loved this movie because it reminded us so much of our own high-school experiences in small towns. She and I had been shuffled around a lot by our parents, so we were usually the new kids in town and generally disliked/distrusted for our awkwardness. I'm not…

Greetings!
I am from the future! The year, in my time, is 2009! The Yes Men have just executed a magnificent prank in NYC! (Yes, NYC is still standing! [Plus, you wouldn't believe who's president!])

Your wordplay lacks vitology.

Nobody likes me.

Johansson vs Birch
If this is truly a world where Ciccione bests Lauper and Johansson outdoes Birch, please let me off.

Whaddya say we cram some pepper jack and special sauce between TJMM's double post?

Meat…
…is the new bread. Arrah!

Scrubbers! FTW.