Holy shit. He was like the only 20th century poet on whom I had any appreciable knowledge. I did a presentation on one of his poems in 10th grade English. It was about a bog, as many of them were. Damn.

I guess my definition of "crime drama" hinges on whether or not it focuses primarily or exclusively on the criminals. The Wire's focus is constantly shifting, and while it gives much more of a voice to the criminals than most cop shows, I think of it more as a broad social commentary than anything.

The Sopranos is the one that sticks out at the moment, both because of Mr. Gandolfini's untimely death and the fact that I don't know too much crime drama generally.

She was threatening in Spring Breakers. Or was she the quiet one? The only person in that movie I can readily identify is Franco, of course.

Did you know that Dexter Holland was a high school valedictorian and at one point was in a doctoral program for molecular biology? I mean, probably a good career decision to stay with the Offspring, but how do you go from that to "Pretty Fly (For a White Guy)"?

At the Pentecostal Assembly of the Holy Flatulence, they encourage speaking in farts. You should check it out, Kirk's giving the sermon this Sunday.

Well you're not invited to the Cave Club, anyways! No girls allowed!

you brought the booze, I trust.

The fallout from Miley-gate continues to blur the lines between something lifted from The Onion, and another reason to live in a cave for the rest of my life.

Around here, it's a bigger crime to not get a BB season 5 reference.

I eat a lot of frozen guac, you know, they make it look so awesome on the packaging, it's like, "hell yeah I want to dip my chips in this guac!," and then you nuke it, and the avocado gets all scabby on top, and it's like you're eating a scab. And seriously, what's that about? It's like, whatever happened to truth in…

You mind if I do a J?

Grave of the Fireflies

Tonight we're goin hard hard ha-ha-ha-hard

Ha ha! Look at Old Man Tity Boi over here!* I hope Tity Gurl makes you 27/64ths of a good meal.

I don't see what this has to do with Christian metalcore.

The only thing I can readily identify James Spader from is that 2000 movie Supernova, one of the shittiest sci-fi movies I've ever seen. I mostly remember it because I had bought a Rage Against the Machine CD at Sam Goody earlier that day.

So we became The Originals. And we had to change our name, actually, there was another band in Dayton called The Originals. So we became The New Originals. Right, The New Originals, and then they changed their name back to The Regulars and we thought, well, we could go back to The Originals, but what's the point?

Are you feeling OK today, AV Club? Rough night at youth group last night?

I think we'd just have more reality TV. The number of Real Housewives shows would increase exponentially, since each incarnation would require a location in both space and time.