My ramblings are fully-baked, thank you.

He really shouldn't just call people the "N" word all the time.

This was never a particularly original concept, but it was executed fairly well. No need to get in a big circle jerk over it.

Dixie Carter gave him a figure-four leg lock until he peed himself.

I would kill to see this show.

Their ugly tchotchkes come pre-dusty.

Stein Mart sells monsters.

You can't get any more sexual than pooping.

How many reasons do I need? The guy was a cardboard cutout. The right demographic at the right time. Not a single ounce of real passion.

Finally, a reasonable response.

Anybody who calls it that doesn't understand it.

You do know that a lot of this stuff would have handled itself, don't you? And as far as preventing another 9/11 attack, I guess that rock in his pocket kept away the bears, too.

Oxygen bar?

I don't imagine that Hillary is completely unfamiliar with reefer.

They like movies and we're a bunch of cynical fucks.

Also him being alive for so many revolutions around the Sun.

Always use the audiobook.

Marshall's is in there somewhere.

1. Be hot.
2. Get hired.
3. Repeat until no longer hot.

Can you be funny? I'm guessing… sure.