Naturally, I'll be out of Denver when you guys are here, running a half marathon with my family in Tucson. Stupid fitness, I hate you!!

Buy a new one ya rich motha fucka!

Buy a new one ya rich motha fucka!

I can't count the number of times I've seen people just wearing Beat headphones around their neck instead of on their ears…I get it. You have Beat headphones. You're super cool!

I can't count the number of times I've seen people just wearing Beat headphones around their neck instead of on their ears…I get it. You have Beat headphones. You're super cool!

I'm so far behind in 30 Rock because one of my roommates seems to be continually deleting it from our DVR…investigation is ongoing.

I'm so far behind in 30 Rock because one of my roommates seems to be continually deleting it from our DVR…investigation is ongoing.

YES

YES

It's often easy to get your 90's TV mixed up. Happens to us all.

It's often easy to get your 90's TV mixed up. Happens to us all.

Isn't that Third Rock From The Sun?

Isn't that Third Rock From The Sun?

Danielle Fishel was on The Soup last night-she looks the same she did all those years ago but not artificial. I'm gonna be pretty OK with seeing her on TV again.

Danielle Fishel was on The Soup last night-she looks the same she did all those years ago but not artificial. I'm gonna be pretty OK with seeing her on TV again.

Yeah…caught the first two minutes or so because I was too lazy to change the channel after The Soup and it was some of the most painfully unfunny two minutes of my life.

Yeah…caught the first two minutes or so because I was too lazy to change the channel after The Soup and it was some of the most painfully unfunny two minutes of my life.

This show would be better with DeNiro in drag.

This show would be better with DeNiro in drag.

BRB, going to cryogenic chamber until January 8th.