Bad toupees are a symbol of wealth and power. Look at Donald Trump.

Wasn't there a commenter a while back with the username "Hell Toupee?"

"Die, Goonies, Die."

Or Alan Hale

I'll trade you a VHS copy of Deep Throat for it.

Stop me if you've heard this one:
Did you hear about the time Richard Nixon went to see the movie Deep Throat? He had to see it six times before he could get it down Pat.

RonanFarrow. There, fixed it for ya.

"Your mother mates out of season."

"Now take my wife. Please."

I read a book once!

That could be any one of us.

Hands Randy Miller III a knife and fork

Not nice, but hilarious.

Not a Rumi fan either, huh?

How'd you do that? It isn't released yet.

"The Urinator-" Great title for a movie parody!

It is for the wizard.

You were right about being wrong.

Barf out.

And the second rule is, you NEVER open the package.