The rhyme is not good enough to overcome the fact that both Oreos and blowjobs are better than the alternatives in this exercise. And probably most others too.

Were you one of the people in that article a while back about people who physically are unable to eat more than one or two foods?

They can't print that!

The alliteration is missing. It would have to be somebody like Recuperating Rick Rubin for this to work.

As long as she doesn't have lovin' on her mind i don't see the problem. Practicing what she preaches.

There's no goddamn way I'm clicking on that.

Well yeah, but you're always naked. When was the last time you saw a horse pull his pants down to shit?

I don't want graphic descriptions of what happens once they're on the toilet, I'm just curious if there's a practical way to get there without getting completely naked.

These bros aren't Batman!

I've wondered that about many women's outfits. Anyone care to help us out here?

YOU SHOULD NEVER BUY VOWELS ANYWAY!!! IT COSTS YOU MONEY AND DOES THE WORK FOR THE NEXT CONTESTANT!!! is what I yell at my TV every time I watch some moron on Wheel of Fortune.

As a native Nebraskan, I'll jump in here to say we're not a dairy state, but we raise a shitload of cattle for the purposes of producing beef. I didn't grow up on a farm, but my dad did and he and my grandpa all raised a small amount of cattle most of my life. I never milked a cow, but I did help plenty with…

The PWR BTTM generates a great deal of PWR.

Pole?

I know a guy whose friends gave him a double headed dildo as a gag gift (heh, gag). Anyway, he named it "Academy Award Winning Actress Jennifer Connelly."

Have you met my son, Earl Jester?

That's awesome you have a kid named Ham.

If I met anyone named Liam I would have a hard time not saying "Liam and me, we're gonna fuck you up!"

Sure it's not the Apostle's Creed?

A friend of mine has a dog named Khaleesi. She's a real fuckhead. The dog, not the friend.