True story: I once went to see Sling Blade in central Texas, and every single person in the audience came dressed as one of the characters in the film.

I can do the Mashed Potato….Oh, shit. Now I've hurt myself.

I'm waiting for that new YelaWolf track featuring Sunn OOO))).

Nope. Alive and well, Fanboy. Alive and well.

Some people would spell that as "accurate" but fuck them.

"Screaming and sobbing in the darkness" is a pretty acurate description of my sex life.

I hope I'm at that show.

Pre-op tranny is my guess.

I once got a bottle in Chaplin, though.

…or asymmetrical. Either one. Take your pick.

@Kara: It was oddly assymetrical.

I'm trying to imagine the circumstanaces that led to the invention of that nifty gadget. Congrats, Golan and Globus, you have unearthed one of the strangest objects ever marketed.

To paraphrase Neil Young, Beefheart led my taste in music from the middle of the road into the ditch. The travelling isn't as smooth, but the people you meet are far more interesting.

Senor Bagofcrap, that is the most disturbing infomercial I've ever seen.

Mind if I do a J?

Also, please excuse the missing quotation marks around "who's." I'm very drunk right now.

Cool, hip people like me no longer use a space between the words "anyone" and who's.

I don't believe I've ever seen anyonewho's only paralyzed above the waist.

I have got to start watching more primetime network shows. Apparently I can save money on porn that way.

@JFC - if you ejaculate, does this constitute your second coming?