You try finding another boat and/or color that rhyme with "gavotte".

umm
"And she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree"

The Ticket is pretty fucking awesome, and it's about time The Great Gordo got his two and a half minutes of minor notoriety. He in the early mornings and Rhynes/Corby/Danny Balis in the late afternoons have kept me sane during my daily soul-raping commute into Dallas from the suburbs.

Yet another reason to hate Chris Berman
Back during Cody Carlson's brief post-Warren Moon stint as starting QB for the Houston Oilers, that fat bitch Berman dropped constant "Commander Cody and the Lost Planet Airmen" references. Get it, because his name is Cody, and so is Commander Cody's?

Yeah, but they had the best pro wrestling gimmick of all time - Mike Awesome, the Fat Chick Thriller (a/k/a That '70s guy). No charisma whatsoever, but he looked like a 'roided-up Eddie Money with a wicked mullet. He committed suicide a couple of years ago. Because once you've been the Fat Chick Thriller, what's…

@Ack Ack - it was called "Della and the Dealer." Great song. "He snorted his coke through a century note, and swore that Boone would die." Can't remember if that line made it past network censors.

I thought she had an internet series where she sits around eating all day while wearing a bikini. Or is that Carnie Wilson?

Isn't Alex Jones the guy who believes the Twin Towers fell not because of al Qaeda crashing planes into them, but because of vampires?

Brushpoppers
The shirts Garth Brooks wore are called brushpoppers. They're made of this thicky, canvas-like material. All of my shitkicker friends back home in east Texas used to wear them, heavily starched and ironed. They were the gayest piece of Western wear ever, and that's some achievement.

Nobody Gets Off In This Town is pretty good too. Everything after the first album sucked balls, though.

And yes to the conspiracy thingie too.

Yes, and yes.

You forgot # 6
Get the words "Sassy Chef" tattooed on your cock.

Ileana Douglas?
She actually looks like she just saw a ghost.

The only black person who wants to turn back the clock to the early 1960s
Hopefully she'll win a few Speshies for this episode.

What?
I ain't no Professor Pickles!

"Let The Day Begin" was used by Al Gore during his triumphant 2000 run to the White House, and Tim Cappello's oiled-up, shirtless rendition of "I Still Believe" in "The Lost Boys" was one of the great moments in American film. So The Call is doing just fine, thanks.

Willie Nelson roast?
Wasn't there supposed to be one on Comedy Central? And, if so, what happened to it? I was really looking forward to seeing how much comedy mileage could be gotten out of "he's so old…" and "he's so stoned…" jokes.

Had that hat been around in the 1860's, the Confederate Army might have more clearly grasped the importance of their mission, and the world might now be a different place.

So much funnier before he got all Jesusy
Black people, you ain't fishin'. Yo' ass is hopin'.