"Showgirls" is an astonishing movie, seeped in irony. I thought Kyle MacLachlan was among those that Verhoeven clued in on what was happening. The whole thing is fun, except when the friend gets raped by Kenny G/Yanni. That's not so fun.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Shia LaBeouf have both artificially low voices. Major distraction. A hazard of being small and boyish, and fame for boyish roles. They're welcome to keep trying, but it makes for weird enunciation and a simulacra of manliness that makes them come across as arch. This episode seemed flat to me,…

Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Shia LaBeouf have both artificially low voices. Major distraction. A hazard of being small and boyish, and fame for boyish roles. They're welcome to keep trying, but it makes for weird enunciation and a simulacra of manliness that makes them come across as arch. This episode seemed flat to me,…

The showrunner is … INSIDE YOUR HOUSE!

The showrunner is … INSIDE YOUR HOUSE!

That dog will be a future target. Don't get attached to the dog, kids! Here, come get groomed to sleep with sexy, sexy grandma instead.

That dog will be a future target. Don't get attached to the dog, kids! Here, come get groomed to sleep with sexy, sexy grandma instead.

Lots of laughs. "it feels weird to be dry." Psy sketch was dull. A solid B. Then Nasim Pedrad's dress bumped it to a +. I support the B+.

Lots of laughs. "it feels weird to be dry." Psy sketch was dull. A solid B. Then Nasim Pedrad's dress bumped it to a +. I support the B+.

Bella sure has that pussy licked.

Bella sure has that pussy licked.

I recognize the titles of none of these songs, and refuse to learn the songs now. Even if you try to teach me with both hands.

I recognize the titles of none of these songs, and refuse to learn the songs now. Even if you try to teach me with both hands.

I would totally de-single Olivia Munn as Dr. Sloan. CALL ME.

I would totally de-single Olivia Munn as Dr. Sloan. CALL ME.

I was gonna eat some China Chow.

I was gonna eat some China Chow.

I would fuck Olivia Munn, like a fucking newsman.

I would fuck Olivia Munn, like a fucking newsman.

Paul Stanley's face has been slowly melting. Kids, never order ROOM SERVICE!