@avclub-5f03e1f1407676a0528f8dd15588f851:disqus , understood.  You should really write some down, though. Please enjoy some of my recent "Deep Thoughts", as drunkenly/stonedly tapped into my phone (please note that they may be terrible):

The left hand: always a bridesmaid…

Clutch - The House That Peterbilt
Built To Spill - Goin' Against Your Mind
Fugazi - And the Same
Modest Mouse - The Good Times Are Killing Me
Talking Heads - Perfect World

Speaking of Mumfords, I was flipping through radio stations in my car the other day and came across a Mumfords song, and my 4-year-old son spontaneously started yelling "Booooooo!"  I had never been more proud.

And now Deep Thoughts, by @avclub-5f03e1f1407676a0528f8dd15588f851:disqus :

Hey, everyone, @Dikachu:disqus says the Lord is near!  The second coming is nigh!

Personally, I can't wait to be a grandfather and act like a lovable dick with total impunity.  I remember him literally stalking a young woman around our house at one point, who had come to tutor another older brother in French, like peeping at her around corners and stuff.  And she just had to pretend to ignore it…

I hear you.  Writing is a misery; commenting is bliss.  It's great to be able to express oneself in writing to intelligent people in a fairly disposable format with instant feedback.  I really like your comments, so please keep it up to the extent that time and energy allow.

Damn your perspicaciousness!  My ruse is undone!

I have no frame of reference for these names.  Just picture me as a very young Wilford Brimley, and my grandfather as a very old Kodi Smit-Mcphee.

Zins are generally pretty good in my experience.  And anyone who would act snobby about a goddamn varietal rather than a specific label/wine (yes, even Merlot, you apoplectic little freak), is a straight-up uninformed poser. And anyone who would act snobby about a specific label or wine is pretty unpleasant too. …

I have an extraordinarily popular and attractive older brother, whom I'll call Bichael, who is now a working actor/model.  When I was about 15, in an absolutely unprecedented development, a couple of really cute girls from my school stopped by my house to chat.  My grandfather, who lived with us at the time, answered.…

My Bond, My Bond, What Have Ye Donned?, in which 007 starts experimenting in transvestitism, slays Judy Dench's M with a sword, then flees to Ecuador to live with a tribe of other transvestites, declares himself dictator for life and hauls a ship over a mountain, just to prove he can do what Fitzcarraldo couldn't, and…

But Jedward is (are?) Irish.  And they're so transcendently, hilariously bad they're actually entertaining in small doses.

My nephew is so disappointed she's not attending.  He's already starting to dismantle his home-made "Make Out With Carly Rae Jepsen to Prove You're Not Gay" booth, and he hadn't even gotten a chance to ask her for her participation yet!

From Cub Scout to Bear Enthusiast: The Craig J. Clark Story

That reminds me, I meant to tell you that I will have had a great time when we met up eleven years from now, and I can't wait to have seen you before again soon!

The Westeros One Million Moms are too busy boinking One Million Uncles to care too much…

My theory was that Ma-Ti's contribution of "heart" (i.e. pro-human mind control) was the only thing stopping CP from being an instrument of Earth's Vengeance against the Human Plague.

No more Mr. Passive Resistance!