Good Luck.
I haven't been sober in years.

Tell me about it.
I have to drive by the side of a Home Depot to get my shoes tied.

Does the Director of an "F" still get a "I Participated" Trophy?
Asking for a friend

You've been crying

Oh Yeah? Americans are fatter with HUGE asses.
Who's the big butt of the joke now?

Good. Here is your Pledge Pin.

Watcha doin?

More Bostonians I know were into the Hives. Most Australians I know were drunk and punched me.

Genesis was:
1. Peter Gabriel
2. Intriguing Phil Collins
3. Mugging Insufferable Pop Wanna-Be Phil Collins

Hey!

Ah, yes. Choking to death on my own, buttery phlegm.

15 days IS a Rock Star Month.
Look it up

So HBO…Winter is NOT coming?

Tell me again, about the Rabbis

KFC is fried, fried.

Where in Florida is New Zealand?

Why are Key and Peele calling him out as a pussy?

Most gyms in 1963 only had one medicine ball, so you had to wait on the reducing machines,

Hee Haw didn't need a laugh track.

I loved them. Saw them in Boston at the Orpheum during "The Gift" tour.
Their only flaw seemed to be a missing sense of humor. Never on the sunny side of the street.