closed drive-ins are ideal places to machete someone. machete 'em good.

that's the spirit; Never Give Up.

it's like they've been hiding in there from bullies for the past 22 years.

the Herman Cain guess is a close one, as Kool Keith is his wife's OBGYN. that's a pretty progressive move on all their parts, especially his wife's parts.

this show has the best tacos.

open water was just a training exercise.

i like how he's so short and nearly perfectly round because when he really screams and rocks out on guitar it looks quite; Odd.

goddamn Illuminati BULLSHIT's what it is. straight up.

imma devise a super-virus
crash your whole computer system and revert you to
something something?

metamucil in your single malt;

"yea, and verily it spilt unto the earth, and the faithful gathered near, murmuring, 'take, eat. this is of the body of our lord jesus kirk.'"

i really enjoy the last book, "The Book of Flatulation", which clearly states that the end times will be marked by the appearance of the four horsemen of the fartocalypse, all riding upon horses who fart bees out of their mouths.

it does say he's going out with marky ramone. the media has dubbed the disarmingly cute couple "Andromone". i imagine if they have a baby it will not be so eloquent.

it is a vortex of awesomeness. were Harry Dean Stanton to ever go there and read aloud from Journey To The End Of The Night, the universe would be torn asunder.

winner: Best Character: "Late Night Pick Up".

i smell a schism.

dude…dinosaurs weren't real. jesus' dad put the bones here to trick us into believing in them so that we would then go to hell. didn't you hear the good news? GOD IS THE ONE WHO KNOCKS UP MARY.

it's called a faygo hole. you can either pour faygo directly in it, or you could insert your penis while shaggy chugs faygo, which is apparently produces a very tickley sensation.

chev-er-ches is actually the gastrointestinal leakage caused by eating too much goat cheese.

how many poop do i rip on the daily?