The NEA frowns on using the National Medal of the Arts ceremony to make religious statements.

The Whos in Ron Howard's live-action Grinch movie looked like they shared Stephen King as their common genetic ancestor.

Followed by them ejaculating all over a glitter banner reading "MAYOR OF GAYTOWN" as part of Franco's new performance art piece.

Sandler just found out that all the movie contracts he's ever signed carried the stipulation that he had to complete a K-12 education before the end of 2016, otherwise he forfeits all the money he's received. It's the real reason studios keep betting on him—they're all pretty sure they'll have their money back by…

Eh, Britain's political dynasties have all been second rate post-Churchill. The Clintons and Bushes would be picking Milibands out of their teeth if they ever crossed the pond.

Well, Richard Branson has a semi-functioning space program whose costs are largely offset by him owning the second-most-popular record store chain in the 90s, so I imagine that the streams of tourists to Buckingham Palace allow the Royal Family to afford a few footmen without getting too deep in the red.

If there's anyone who could do a good job of this, it's Ridley Scott. Most of his best movies tend to focus on specific processes and following them through to their logical conclusion, so he seems like a pretty ideal director choice. Michael Mann could probably do something with it, but he's only done sci-fi once.

They alive dammit!
(so obviously they were not raped)

In that case, you'd be fine with either Consider the Lobster or A Supposedly Fun Thing I'd Never Do Again. The important thing in either case is not to rule out essays because they sound boring or you don't know anything about the subject. Think a 70-page review of a usage dictionary isn't your sort of thing? Don't…

To the Lighthouse? Pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffftt.

To the Lighthouse? Pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffftt.

"His dong is so big that he passes out every time he gets an erection."

That is what it means.

Well, then, there's something else wrong with the above review, because I don't know how this book can already have a prequel when it just came out.

What you're actually saying, though, is that you have never said the exact same particular stupid shit this guy said. I have no trouble believing that many people here 1) have never referred to women as "whores" online (unless they're writing in a parodic Frank Miller voice, or engaging in one of the hundreds of…

A twist I would actually kind of enjoy: it turns out the grandparents ARE just old and weird, so they have no way of defending themselves when they are stabbed and bludgeoned to death by their paranoid, iPhone-addled grandchildren.

I'd say aklab and bloomability answered your question as honesty as you could expect anyone to. Let's run their responses through the translator:

Sounds like a promising opening bit for a budding young alt-comedian!

I don't believe Lt. Broccoli ever posted any such thing.

Okay, buddy. Don't get too upset when your fifth grade class gets to the second page of Huckleberry Finn—teacher's already warned you about crying in class twice this year.