You mean your library doesn't have any theft instruments you can borrow?

Dammit, now I have to decide whether I really want Country Grammar on my hard drive or not. There are a bunch of albums here that have a few good songs, but I don't know if I want the stigma of owning the whole album.

I have Windows 8.1, and I've got a taskbar, a Start button, and can find the control panel easily (by right-clicking on the Start button). Are you sure that you installed Windows 8 and not, I dunno, a Jamiroquai CD?

The POV shot of gladiators running out of the tunnel makes that entire movie worthwhile.

Good point- I just watched the movie, and Jackie had gotten off light on an earlier charge because she testified against her husband. Max knows if anything goes bad she'll send him down the river, and he knows things are too likely to go bad for him to take that risk.

Wait, you want a slow-burn thriller from Tarantino but you didn't like Inglorious Basterds? Every single scene in that movie is a damn slow burn!

Apparently they offered him the role, but his agent turned it down for him, saying it wasn't big enough for Jerry. I don't know how you get to be Jerry Seinfeld's agent and not know a joke when you see one.

Well, I think that the phrase "Bill Cosby's monstrous crimes" in the Statler and Waldorf post really gives the game away here. The court of public opinion doesn't like anyone questioning its rulings, and the second people start mentioning that, say, "Bill Cosby's monstrous crimes" are not nearly as sure a thing as…

A question to your question: what kind of egomaniac demands that all their favorite art reflect their own inner self right back at them? I love Neutral Milk Hotel because Jeff Mangum evokes the sort of pure earnest self-expression that was roundly beaten out of my inner and outer selves around age 13 and never really…

As someone who has a much less well-styled version of that haircut, I'll thank you not to call it "weird." Especially when it's clearly the turtleneck/sport coat combo that's the weirdest thing about JGL's look.

For me, the moment was him running around a restaurant half-naked and covered in beans. "Try to catch me! No one's tryyying very harrrd!"

On the other hand, Gene is an 11-year-old boy, which is basically the closest the organism homo sapiens gets to producing a walking, talking fart joke.

"And in food news, you've had enough to eat today. Now here with the weather is Johnny Mountain."

If that exact sentence has not been used as a punchline in The Big Bang Theory, I would be incredibly surprised.

My favorite game I discovered this year was Hotline Miami, which I've played through 1.5 times. It's one of those games where the gameplay is simple yet addicting- I couldn't believe how easy it was to get sucked into a particular map, running through it again and again trying to kill everyone. I know the game was…

Awesome! My first shout-out in Keyboard Geniuses! I don't have much else to say, except that I'm finally playing Just Cause 2 and Arkham Asylum, both of which will help me catch up on the games of about 5 years ago.

I was impressed by how vicious Colbert's bit was.

"Archmage of the Ether" sounds like the name of an at-large serial rapist who wears a cloak.

The Walkmen's album Lisbon always feels very Christmassy for me, even though it's got at least one song about surfing. Probably because I played it in the car when driving home for Christmas (from a warm climate to a relatively wintry one) for about three years straight.

He gets a lifetime pass for probably being the primary reason Galaxy Quest actually got made.