Read the Gotham Central comic books and get back to me on that.

Yes, it's a good thing women can't access the internet, because if there is one thing all guys are trying to keep a secret, it's that they like women, and would like to have sex with some of them. But women can never know that guys might want to have sex with them, because if they find out, they will know the guy…

This song was the free song of the week when I first joined iTunes. It's weird that I still remember that.

Smug doesn't disqualify cute. I can just imagine that dog walking into the house and saying "I shall take my tea in the pah-lor today, Carson, and afterwards I should like a nice pile of filth in which to roll about."

And the "Polish Remover of Na-eeel!"

That is one smug-looking dog.

I'm just starting to realize that this show is trying to be a combination of Friends, Seinfeld, and Cheers. Well, if you're gonna borrow, I guess you borrow from the best. Too bad they couldn't get a one-word title.

Or at the beginning, when he's afraid to see Caroline: "“What if she hurts me physically? WHAT IF SHE HURTS ME WITH WORDS?”

I loved how Schmidt gave his friends keys so they would come over more, and instead they used his place as a bang palace, and then rather than being mad, he got excited about the whole thing. Great way to make the personalities bounce off each other.

"Grapes! We know you're in there! Now come out with your stems up!"

"Because I didn't like you for a LONG time."

When Coach and Winston almost went into the wrong rooms, I laughed very hard.

Why didn't he just offer to drive her? Is it normal in LA for people to leave a bar together and then drive to an address in two separate cars?

Philip Seymour Hoffman was younger than both my parents?

Colombian neckties are quite thinning.

There are far too many good ideas in the two posts above me; I think my head is spinning a little.

Fillion's character collapsing in tears when he couldn't look up porn at work was just wonderful.

He's fine; he's about to become a Pirate King.

How are his glasses staying on? He doesn't have ears! And yes, that's the most ridiculous thing about this entire concept!

I'm pretty sure Man-Thing's name alone puts him above Thor.