PS Hoffman could have reaaaaaally used that D.A.R.E. money

We've already got a Law & Order: SVU.

Our vacant-eyed, plump-lipped, flat-haired savior.

She also cast a spell for "Least Flattering Jumpsuit of the Spring 1983 Sears Catalogue"

I never thought in a million years Vanessa Hudgens would have this much charm

….Goddamnit. You are a legend.

That was what that band need. "MORE SAD FIFE," screamed their producer. But no. They went with atonal rapping and scratches

I don't think Tomi Lahrens reproduce sexually. I think they asexually lay a clutch of eggs in the sand like a sea turtle

So, wait…does he like weed?

…What won you over? Was it the Turtle Club gag?

Holy god. "Kino." Beautiful.

He is.

So much better than previous lackeys, H.R. Puffinstuff (a mayor), H.R. Pennypacker (wealthy industrialist) and S.R. Hadden (a wealthy ball of cancer that wants to send Jodie Foster to the moon)

Rhona Mitra is a more engaging actress than Kate Beckinsale. For proof, I've give you: DOOMSDAY

If I ever found out my friends had done this, and used that kind of picture? I would just walk toward the nearest living thing and kill it

…There has to be a better name for that.

"All right, gang. We're going to Earth-2, and I'm gonna need backup. Who…who here has parents? … I'm not seeing a hand, so, uh…Caitlin! C'mon, girl. You're not a liability. Uh, I mean shy. You're not shy! Let's go."

Your Flash Gordon movie did, however, try a Hawkman. And he was magnificent.

By being a wicked smaht ape, son. It don't mattah what breech yah fell outta, kid, if you ah wicked smaht ape, you get to rule ape kind.

Sir or madam,