This might be my very favorite explanation of his career path post-1979. He didn't lose his touch, he just became the modern version of the kind of guy Gabby Hayes pretended to be. It makes his decline hilarious rather than really, really, really sad

Always, Mr. Greene. Always.

Two for the Money, to answer your question, was a misguided piece of garbage. Oh god, did I hate that movie. But I agree with RT: Insomnia is hands-down Pacino's best performance of the last fifteen years. (For what it's worth, it's also Robin Williams') Also? I fucking loved Sea of Love. Don't know why, but I can…

It sounds like "Lush Life's" Richard Price, just without a middle-aged cop who embarrassingly goes by "Matty"

Give me Paul Winfield's "City Confidential" or GIVE ME DEATH

But he wants billionaires TO BUILD THEIR OWN FUCKING STADIUMS. He's a rebel, but he's on our side, you see

I do. And I weep, softly.

"Mr. SandLAH, I need to THANK YOU. For giving me…MY PASSION BACK." [Goggles his eyes at a passing woman's ass] HOO-AHH."

20 years. My god…

Oh, well, excuse me, Mr. Fancypants. I guess "WOMEN ARE TERRIBLE OHMYGOD FUCK WOMEN" isn't a diverse enough thesis for you

It would, save for two things: One, no banana peppers. Two? It does a Eddie Murphy laugh every time he bites into it, to remind him he did Showtime

When did Pacino give up? Was it Scarface in '83? Bobby Deerfield, maybe?

When did Macho Man Randy Savage give up? Can we get a graph on that? Was it when he went to the WCW, or after he (allegedly) boned Stefanie McMahon?

"EVERYBODY GO OUT TO FUCKING LUNCH," he screamed in Cop Land, and then he…promptly went out to lunch. He's currently sitting in a seaside shop in New Jersey, housing a hoagie that has "failure" written across the side in seasame seeds

I don't necessarily agree with you on the DeNiro front, but I am delighted by the image of a respected critic, holding court over a class like the old bastard from The Paper Chase, gravely intoning, "Robert De Niro…sucks donkey dick" and then the class gasps

So goddamn good. And the second had potential….for awhile. Saul Berensen, though? Never dipped in quality once.

"Uh, yeah, I'm here for the audition, mate. …Who am I? I'm Skippy Hemsworth…Thespian"

199….4? 5?

Aaron Eckhart is back and ready to break hearts all over again. Only this time, he's with a Hemsworth. Any of them. (Probably the cheap one)

Turns out jet fuel *can* melt an actor's desire for respect