Best Machine Man ever written.

Mark Millar has pretty much turned into the Michael Bay of comics. I liked the first two Ultimate collections and some of his other earlier stuff. Chosen was pretty funny. But Jesus Christ has he gone full suck.

Is the new Moon Knight any good? I like Ellis's work, but was never into Moon Knight.

Well, that blackout episode has done wonders for your spelling.

Fuck this noise! Where is my Patch Adams sequel?

I cannot express with mere words how upset I am by the fact that The Av Club has failed to review A Haunted House 2. I really wanted to know if it was going to be the funniest movie of the year, or the funniest movie of all time. Way to let me down guys…

What woman in her right mind wouldn't want to pay money to Woody Allen to have sex with John Turturro?

Fuck Yeah Shogun Warriors! My Sister and I got them for Christmas back in the 70's. She got the one that shot rockets from it's hands, and I got the one that threw axes. Both the rockets and the axes were confiscated by Dec. 26 because my parents were sick of us terrorizing our baby brother with repeated shootings.…

Liked for the " poignant loss of childhood " aspect of your story, loved for the image of a first grade Alien Jesus going buck wild on his older brother with a golf club. Make sure that story is in the Alien New Testament.

HO! HAHA! Guard, Turn, Parry, Dodge, Spin, HA! Thrust!

You should read Radley Balko's Rise of the Warrior Cop: The Militarization of America's Police Forces. It's a really good look at the history of S.W.A.T. and police in general. It's also really fucking scary.

" Hey! You got slavery all over my transvestism movie! "
" No, you got transvestism all over my slavery movie! "

Now I have a picture of Dikachu's boozing/jacking it training montage in my head…

I'm in Elsmere ( right behind Corpus Christi ) and my neighborhood is really so nice and quiet I rarely lock my doors at night. It is just sad how bad the city has gotten over the years. I used to hang out in Browntown with all my friends as a teen, and now when I drive through that area I just feel sad.

I have some Nigerian Oil money I need help transferring out of the country, if you're willing to pay the exchange fees I'll let you keep 30% of the 20 million dollars. I'm a Nigerian Prince, by the way, so my word is good.

Wow. This kid's as deep as a saucepan.

Tity Boi: Now 50% more absorbent than the leading roll of paper towels!

I always liked B.B. King's " There is Always One More Time " or Stevie Ray Vaughan's " Couldn't Stand the Weather ".

Wilmington in da House! Yeah, I didn't hear about it until years after the fact, but The News Journal is really a joke of a newspaper that barely covered the story. It's really disturbing what a free-fire zone Wilmington has turned into over the course of my lifetime.

* audience gives standing ovation, demands encore *