Do they take food-stamps and unemployment checks? I want to help out!

Man, I am so sick of the anti-1% rhetoric in this country. Good for you Wall Street! Time for you to stand up for yourselves! I hope this guy takes Paramount to the cleaners!

Ask her some questions that are Gross, Point Blank.

Communism by definition is a wonderful idea. Unfortunately, like any form of government, (except, of course, good 'ol fashioned US democracy) the people in control are usually sociopaths who turn it into a totalitarianism.

I'd really rather see a movie with a bunch of his short stories on the screen, instead of just one turned into a feature.

Hey, I'm an unmarried smelly uncle! Finally, a place for me and my ilk!

I'll check it out on my way to drop off the movies I rented.

What's a " Record Store " ?

The Horror….The Horror…

" Did you finish cleaning the bathroom, or do you still have too many teeth? "
- Booti Gurl

ALL RIGHT! LET'S DO THIS!
* adjusts green bikini *

If anyone deserves the Gold for violent protest, it is definitely the Ukraine.

Thank you for further cementing my hatred of humanity.

Booti Gurl?

Putin's plan to glorify Russia by having the Olympic games held there is really working out so well.

Apparently he is going to cop a plea deal where he'll have to take drug education classes instead of serving any jail time. I guess he had no idea slipping X into someone's drink was wrong, so these classes will set him straight. Why do we even bother charging celebrities with crimes anymore?

Damn it! You beat me to that one…

" She only does it because she loves me! I can change her!"

You looked stressed in the kitchen? Does she beat you when you mess up dinner?
* Rips sunglasses off Tity Boi's face, revealing two black eyes, makes him roll up his sleeves to reveal bruises *
Let's get you to a shelter….

The sad thing is about half the people who suggested I quit, have already suggested I " Just lighten up and have a few drinks." I hate my friends…