Amount of days without Booze: 49.
Number of days someone has asked: " Are you Okay? You seem angry. ": 43
Sobriety does not agree with me.

Beat it, you filthy Hippie!

If I want to get out of sex I just slam my hand in the car door.

Iv'e never seen a toilet so clogged from upper-deckers before!

AL! When did you escape from that Turkish prison?

You're dingus is obviously under the influence of Satan. Instead of pulling it, remove your shirt, take a cat o' nine tails, and whip yourself for a good half an hour. Then pray to Jesus for forgiveness and send a check to:
The Bishop Ministries
15 Credibility Street
Harve de Grace MD 21078
Trust me, i'm Clergy. It'll…

I wish that after Colbert had dumped all the pennies on Fallon he would have jammed the empty bucket on Fallon's head and kicked it as hard as he possibly could have. Or hit it with a cricket bat. Or a six pound splitting maul. or a- well, you see where i'm going with this.

Ride Along 2: Are We All Sick of Kevin Hart Yet?

2 Ride, 2 Along

Good point. Getting On's cast was pretty brilliant.

I only saw about two episodes of that show and it was just horrible. I guess maybe it's not fair of me to judge it being given an award.

Super Fun Night getting an award pretty much destroys the credibility of the Gracie awards as far as i'm concerned.

It would be Perfect.

My interest in seeing this show is Zero.

I would rather shoot myself with a Bullet with Butterfly Wings than see this show.

Probably an eight hour concert about Siddhartha…

Who exactly is she trying to appeal to these days? Stoners? Bill Clinton detractors? I don't understand….

Were I on that show, the dialogue would be drowned out by the woman's constant vomiting.

Speak for yourself, i'd watch that shit out of that show!

Genius is never understood in it's own time. I'm sure history will vindicate you…