I think it's clear Betty White will live forever.

Some people remember that, but they are all responding to your comment via first class mail.

The secret is just to let the boat do the work.

I know, I love that stupid movie. "All right, diving!"

That man never had a diabetus in his life.

If I remember right it was a way for them to fire all their union employees.

I'll take you to the looneypen, I'm going to the brewery.

Stop throwing your garbage over the fence.

I hear the Dilbert guy has a beautiful singing voice.

Son, if you really want something in life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

Wasn't there an old SNL sketch where Tracy Morgan played a director who was nonchalantly telling stories about all the dogs that were killed on his latest movie?

But it costs three times as much as American cheese.

that IS fun!

I'm going to sign up as a black Muslim reporter and see how long it takes to get murdered.

Maple Match is a part of a complete breakfast.

It's a metaphor for our modern-day anxieties about jar-babies and tentacle apocalypses.

about the ox?

I remember that. Jerry Stiller played King Arthur's father-in-law.

Big mistake. Name one piece of literature that would be improved by removing its gangbang.

Hepatitis R