Hey, my kids may be ugly and obnoxious, but…
what's the third thing you said?

Cerulean warblers
I bought three tickets for Rio via the free market this weekend, and zero for Atlas Shrugged. Suck it, Rand.

What's
the title of this movie again?

I
Feel bad about myself

Not Salon, Jezebel.

Get a job? Were they serious? A little part of my childhood died forever.
What are you looking at boy!

And it only transports matter? Hmmm….

Ooh, we honeymooned in Charleston. Great cemetery tours, food, and timeshare pitches.

Dogs and cats living together, mass hysteria!

Not if he's a vampire, a fact criminally underreported by the liberal mainstream media.

Faygo, ha ha - that machine used to be in front of our Sentry store. 1 dollar would get me a USA Today with the baseball standings and a grape Faygo.

I enjoyed The Rundown also, Dr.

Superstar Mike Morris:
"……….and Dan."

Bill Michaels 620 TMJ:
According to sources, Green Bay Packers cornerback Brandon Underwood will not be charged with sexual assault. The charge being considered is solicitation of prostitution. The two women who levied the allegations of sexual assault could be charged with prostitution.

I thought "Law and Order SVU is what your parents watch while you are upstairs trying to rape your girlfriend" was a funny line.

"Other Shows" is fine.

I think Law and Order was canceled too soon.

Nuts and gum together at last.

I think it's Proft.

You are 75 years old.