The first Jack Reacher was an adaptation of a book, does that count?

I'm surprised they're willing to cast a woman that old.

Well, if I had my case there would definitely be stuff to endanger them. If children can't navigate danger then how are they supposed to navigate danger when they're an adult?

Wait, parents want to have the play dates at their house? I would be completely fine letting my monstrosity go over to their houses and ruin their house instead of mine.

I thought that was a few years ago.

Why do you think we keep calling him Paste Pot Pete?

Curse him and his horrible policies limiting us to only 100 bullets per magazine!

Unless she has a mummy fetish…

Mountain Dew?

That sounds like one of those things where looking at it you've got a horrified expression on your face and yet you can't stop your hand from picking up a slice and putting it in your mouth.

Crap, that movie did change my life so I guess you don't want to know me.

I'd watch that match.

You mean Donald Trump's spawning cave?

Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Woooooould youuuuuuuuuuu?

Would you?

Did you just call me a dildo?

After he's done with it it will be the classiest, most luxurious country in the world with everything plated in gold.

That doesn't sound like a high bar to cross.

*Jumps around*