Mr Oates, if that's on me then that isn't really very nice is it? Maybe you think you're tough here but you'll be a small fish in a very big pond at college, you'll see.

Yo String
Difference between him and Jerry O'Connell's character is O'Connell bleds red and he bleeds green.

There is no more appropriate column in which to wish you horrible skin rotting, brain liquifying plagues and death in horrific infernos than this.

"A Christmas in Carol"

Captain Giant Penis-Haver.

Like a shaved poodle having a fit.

Madame, up until that post I was skeptical but - "Should you choose to be Papists, of course, I can offer nothing for you save a request that you refrain from your debaucheries in decent neighbourhoods." - nailed it hard. Nailed it hard like a pentrative sex act, amirite?

Thanks a lot, AV Club. I guess I'll just imagine in my head what the music sounds like here in not-America.

"Half-Life: Full-Life Consequences" was great, but not for the reasons the author hoped.

The picture says "I'm wacky" but also "please love my movie and by extension me." It is a picture that tells exactly 10 words.

I have bought at least one Constellation release for the artwork alone.

Isn't it "Hold out hope that someone or other might come"?

Playing Schism on GHWT was weird because I can actually play that main riff on a normal guitar but was completely baffled by plastic guitaring it.

I will never understand why people want to listen to Diet Sabbath.

Know Your Meme
I'd like to thank a commenter on here for introducing me to www.knowyourmeme.com. It's one of those 'I wish someone would make…' kinda sites.

I love you, Tom Waits for Snowman.

The future - brought to you by Extra gum.

Well probably, I mean they could see Russia from their house.

I repect him.
I respect him for:

Excellent. The Tom Cruise bits and the David Vaginarm Beckham bit are my favourites. Also any of the bits with Richard Ayoade because he's the best.