Too soon! Or not soon enough? Either one.

There is a standing offer for that. He just needs to redeem it with a gift card.

I love you in a deeply profound way that is almost confusingly simple.

I'm not in town this week, unfortunately. Try me next weekend!

Uhm Spoiler Alert

I don't have class this week! I got a haircut I thought was sexy but may actually make me look like a 14 year old! I looked at porn and then touched myself and then orgasmed and then ate pizza (the exact order of events may be different)! It's been a good week.

There is little comfort you can provide someone dying. Working in the hospital, I have found that people tend to know exactly when they are about to go. I would focus not on making him feel better about his medical situation but talk to him about your relationship. Tell him exactly how you feel. If you are going to…

That line tried to invalidate all my sex dreams and fan fiction, but it failed. Nice try, Fuller.

Yes! My favorite is when she walks into the bathroom saying she is going to "drop a big one" and comes out with a baby.

Wait, is that right? Didn't Futurama originally end in 2003 or 2004? Sons of Anarchy didn't start until 2008. Maybe you're thinking of the new series finale ("Meanwhile")

The quality of the Comedy Central era is very inconsistent compared to the original run, but there are some beauties. What I can remember:
"The Late Philip J. Fry" (one of the best episodes of the entire series)
"Meanwhile" (the new series finale that managed to hold a candle to the original)
"The Prisoner of Benda" (A…

Gosh The Devil's Hands are Idle Playthings is such a great episode. Full of humor, wit, and some great voice performances. It was such a perfect way to end the show (and the fact that Futurama got a second chance and ended with an equally great episode truly impressive). I can't think of an animated show that is so…

I'm going to be flying friday and wedding shopping/being a drunk slut Saturday. So, maybe.

My fall semester is packed, but maybe I can squeeze in a trip at some point. It's just so hard to make room for trips. Penis butthole.

Yes, Dik. Please buy him a bus ticket. I'm volunteering you to do this, because I'm living off of student loans.

I know! I'm such a little shit. I so rarely go out because of school. I'm going to try and approach this next semester with a "I'm allowed a friggen beer at a bar every now and then" attitude.

Stop that sounds so fun!

THAT CAN BE MY THIRD SEXY THING

Favorite position? Any position, because that means I'm having sex with someone who isn't my pillow.

Tell, tell, tell. You don't want to start this relationship (platonic or romantic) on a false-ish foot. Plus, it will probably start to bug you if you never figure out whether he forgot or chose not to say anything.