Supposedly (if my creaky memory of "Behind the Music" or whatever is accurate), that song, which was their biggest hit, it what helped lead to their initial breakup. They each recorded their vocals separately on different days or something, and they all (except maybe Hoffs) felt disgusted by the cookie-cutter approach…

Are you thinking of Garry "Gary" Beers from INXS?

One problem, if I recall correctly, is that the middle Manhattan-ish island was arguably the coolest, but you unlocked the New Jersey-ish area last to reveal … New Jersey. Talk about anticlimactic!

It's because of Roman's charisma that I chose to let him live at the end of the game. I realized that I would give up the love of a woman for everlasting companionship with my cool cousin.

Not to mention Harry Dean Stanton.

"Cudgel" is exactly the word I used when I couldn't figure out what kind of weapon he was using to bash skulls.

Paul called his mother a "cooze" — does anyone not in a James Ellroy novel ever say that anymore?

This was true in the NYC metro area, too — we'd find some crazy cartoon or non-WWF wrestling show (I read all the Apter magazines in the 80s and it was like finding the Holy Grail to see a live Ric Flair interview or Road Warriors match), watch it through a snowy haze as we tried to fine-tune the channel, and then be…

Back in circa 1983(?), Uncle Floyd came in very clearly on channel 68. I think it was broadcast out of Secaucus. Mine was the only family on Long Island without cable, so my only exposure to music videos was MTV at a friend's house, NBC's "Friday Night Videos," and the brief time that channel 68 called itself "U68"…

It's…my…JOB!

I never thought "Bert" as a shortening for "Robert" was a good idea, either. And I prefer "Ant" to "Tony" or "Thony."

I actually enjoyed the Headlines segment and watched it every Monday. Somehow, Leno was a perfect fit for it, and he was clearly having a great time. Sometimes, though, I try to come up with better punchlines, which isn't really that hard.

There used to be (before it was taken down) a YouTube clip of Dick Shawn on the Dinah Shore show, and he did this whole monologue-into-showstopping-song thing and it was amazing, but you couldn't classify it as anything but "entertainment," which is probably why he was best as a nightclub guy and didn't have…

I bought some Christmas DVD collection that includes Rudolph and both Frostys and I've warned my kids that I'll disown them if they play Frosty Returns.

Eeesh. They used to run Murder by Death on TV in the 70s and as a single-digit-aged kid I wanted to like it. It ran on cable a few months ago and as an adult it's easy to see how awful it is.

http://the-a-plus.blogspot…. — I haven't updated in a year (holy moly) but I'm looking to get back on the horse. Hit me up if you want to contribute!

I actually write (and occasionally abandon) a blog about Christgau's reviews. They're fascinating, particularly the shortest ones that will tear apart an album in fewer than a dozen words.

"HEY! STEVE!"

"Kelsey Grammer!"

What it comes down to is, I like seeing a bear spray-painting the forest with graffiti that says, simply, "BEAR."