I try to stay away from fanboy-ism, especially of the decades-old variety, but the N64 controller was awful. It was ideally designed for a person with three hands, and it managed to be both too bulky and frustratingly petite for must of us non-mutants.

I think he's trying to attempting to retroactively give that movie a bad review. I have no problem with that… because I think that movie deserves a retroactive beating.

Huh, I always imagined real-life Quiddich-ers running around holding broomsticks between their legs. I guess I'm… disappointed?

The snitch rule in Quiddich never made any sense to me, other than as an easy way for the outcome of every single match to be determined by solely by the actions of the protagonist.

It baffles me when Hollywood makes a movie musical and then tries to cover up the fact that the movie is a musical. Hey Hollywood, here's an idea: If you don't think musicals will sell enough tickers, THEN DONT MAKE A FUCKING MUSICAL. YEEARRRGHHHHHH

2,000 is the average for all adults, I think, while 2,500 is the average for adult males. This is because we all work at construction sites, cattle ranges, and steel mills.

"I am the state."

I figured they would calculate the Bottomless Fries by measuring how much the average male could eat before he vomited and/or died.

Hey! Get your royalist burgers out of my country!

For being the worst meal in America, the Red Robin offering doesn't even sound that good.

What killed the dinosaurs?

Then you'd just have some guy who was really into cold and freezing, which is preposterous!

He's more d-bag than man now, twisted and evil.

I like the comparison, but the protagonist death in Psycho is immediate and permanent, whereas the Raiden switcharoo is an agonizing litany of gradual revelation:
"Who's this weird guy?"
"Where'd Snake go?"
"Is this an extended dream sequence?"
"Am I really going to be playing as this guy the entire game?"
"Fuuuuuuuuu—"

Oh my god, I was wrong.
He was Christ all along.

It's more pseudoscience-y than horoscopes.

I suspect one could make a sustained Tumblr blog of all the faces Jack Nicholson makes in that movie.

I thought Legolas *was* the Elvish Jesus.

All fantasy novel adaptations should have CGI rabbit-driven sleighs. How could they not make the story better?

Dawson's Rapidly Degenerating Third-World Nation.