"Behind these doors, a federal judge will ladle out steaming bowls of rich, creamy justice in a case the media have dubbed 'Beat-Up Waiter.'  This reporter suggested 'Waitergate,' but was shouted down at the press club."

"Give me those!"

He was the most talented one!

The man aside, let us not forget that the first Wayne's World, the first Austin Powers, and So I Married An Axe Murderer are pretty much gold, especially when you're in that sweet 15- to 25-year-old demographic.

90% of Seinfeld plots would be resolved by the existence of cell phones.  Sounds pretty dated to me. 

But that won't stop me from posting that entire exchange:

It's actually hard to do "best Cheers quotes" because (a) so much of the humor is not "jokey" in the traditional sense (Norm's entrances being an exception), or (b) relatedly, relating a Cheers joke usually means replaying an entire conversation between two (or more) people, because the payoff is at the very end. …

What, no "Waikiki Hockey"? 

I'm a locksmith.  And… I'm a locksmith.

I never really bought that Marge and Lisa would gleefully join in the picnic food fight, but at least that gave us:  "Todd's got zesty Italian in his eye."

Yes it is, Kent. 

This show is fantastic.  I have nothing to add to the discussion except:

You know, something about that didn't look right when I wrote it…

Uh, not so much.  You didn't provide any commentary or other characteristics that would render it "fair use."  You just copied it.  That's not how it works.

Hey, remember when Simpsons episode titles were normal, descriptive, and didn’t routinely consist of depressingly lame puns?  The last four episodes have been “Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy,” “Homer and Apu,” “Bart Gets Famous,” and “Homer the Vigilante.”  I grant you that the episode title before that was the painful…

I heard that!

Do you not like her?

"the growing problem of hunger in America, which affects more than 50 million Americans."

My cousin's in a bubble.  My friend Jeffrey's sister… also a bubble. 

Bite da bone, grab da phone, I be Ollie Wendel Jone'.