My childhood crush became super religious, got married at 19 and has 5 kids now. Feel like I dodged a bullet on that one.

Long time lurker, occasional poster last year, but I've been mostly quiet since October (largely because disqus was blocked at my office until about a month ago). I'm a guy in Chicago who just can't live without rageohol. Welcome to the club, it doesn't suck as much as the rest of the internet.

1994 Ford Explorer Limited. Became mine in 2002. Drove it for a year before the alternator exploded while going 70mph on the freeway. The folks at the Ford dealership said they'd never seen anything like that happen before but they were "totally sure" it was safe to drive home. I ended up just donating it to charity.

Ok, this feels like the appropriate time to share my time-tested, imprecise , kick-ass super bowl season wings recipe. Through trial and error I've found this to be the scientifically best way to make wings at home, so listen up and prepare yourself for chicken-y goodness during Super Bowl XVIXLLCIIVVXLCQ this weekend.

Seriously. This has me busting up at work and I can't even explain to my coworkers what I'm laughing about.

Even though I know it's the wrong Ocean, every damn mention of Frank on the newswire gets "Carribean Queen" stuck in my head for at least an hour. It's almost as annoying as hearing about anything Chris Brown does. Fuck that guy.

Ironically, the villain in this installment will actually be named Mister Falcon.

I dunno, waiting until the Browns/Ravens week of Thursday Night Football was pretty smart. A lot of sports fans would rather see submarines blow things up than watch Brandon Weeden fall down a bunch of times.

I dunno, waiting until the Browns/Ravens week of Thursday Night Football was pretty smart. A lot of sports fans would rather see submarines blow things up than watch Brandon Weeden fall down a bunch of times.

Roll Tide

Roll Tide

I get annoyed with certain aspects (chiefly the Barney/Robin relationship and most of what Ted does) but it's a reliably funny show that has the good fortune of being in a time slot where I rarely have anything better to do.

I get annoyed with certain aspects (chiefly the Barney/Robin relationship and most of what Ted does) but it's a reliably funny show that has the good fortune of being in a time slot where I rarely have anything better to do.

Ahh, shit, you're right. I guess I'm more racist than I thought.

Ahh, shit, you're right. I guess I'm more racist than I thought.

Lets all just agree that this incident is sad and that Kurt Sutter is a dick regardless of what he said today.

Lets all just agree that this incident is sad and that Kurt Sutter is a dick regardless of what he said today.

I think it mostly seems dickish to some people here because we're used to Sutter being kind of a dick most of the time. But his reaction is pretty much spot-on for someone in this situation. Once a friend/relative slides past a certain point into their addiction you become resigned to their fate and aren't too…

I think it mostly seems dickish to some people here because we're used to Sutter being kind of a dick most of the time. But his reaction is pretty much spot-on for someone in this situation. Once a friend/relative slides past a certain point into their addiction you become resigned to their fate and aren't too…

Either in Mexico or prison, depending on which way they turned.