@Master Ninja Theme Song, plus, like hell if he's gonna contribute to the diabetes epidemic in this country.

Dispose of your japes, foul wench! It is heaven's labors I must perform this day!

"the sucking of goatse"

Maybe. Good question…

Prithee, good wife, wither hast thou hidden my cloaks and armaments of power?

So yeah, porn star.

Auguste Brodin, Broseiden, lord of the brocean

The bold audience of The Onion have had their way.

Having a guy named Ed play a guy named Once-ler (which sounds like Wuncler) just makes me miss The Boondocks.

Well technically it's not with our tax dollars, but rather with the dollars that they rightfully should be giving to the government.

We certainly would if you'd just give us her name already!

The long run being, of course, what Mr. Biggs calls his penis.

@The Hero, you can just say hair-metal drummer.

Abed is Fabio now.

He always shot first. You just couldn't see it without Sean O'Neal's help.

She's off tonight. This is Veronica Corningstone.

I dunno, Fat Guy Stuck In The Internet was pretty awful too. Maybe worse than SotM.

And to think, Kanye didn't want to take you to the Ghetto University

It's almost better if he was.

So you'll hate him, because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector. A dark knight.