A horny Australian cable repair intern who is addicted to raw chicken (but only on Wednesdays)
An overweight albino plumber from Nagasaki who wants to love but can't
A BTO cover band from Niagara Falls who all look like Javier Bardem, except for the fact that they're black women

You mean, vagina? I mean, you know the guy?

Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Teabagged?

Lucy Liu Flu and a hyper tolerance to lactose for you!

I can see kids being into Fantastic Mr. Fox. It's lighthearted and silly without being completely condescending enough to spell everything out or have a nice, tidy resolution because they think that kids can't handle reality. Where the Wild Things Are, on the other hand, is really slow and somber (not to mention…

And just to go a bit further, I get where you come from sometimes. The casual racism and misogyny gets out of hand on these boards sometimes, and I don't like it any more than you do, even though sometimes I get caught up in it. I'm no saint, that's for damn sure. I totally respect you for calling people out for…

Actually we broke up two weeks ago. It's been a really rough time for me, and since I knew that you can't resist fucking poking at me for such a dumb, childish reason, I didn't bring it up. I hope you're really satisfied with your lot in life, teadoust. I know our little exchanges come across as jokey, but they really…

La FAIL Boheme

He should've been like, "My name's Henry…and you're in here with ME now!"

Yeah I sure would like to engage in sexual intercourse with her as well!

Eh, I dunno. I thought that the girl he confronted was being a bit condescending. Did he take it a bit too far, though? Yes. But he's Henry Fucking Rollins, of course he's going to be confrontational about it.

Definitely have to go with Gonzo. He always just does his own thing, and even though he often gets too crazy, the rest of the group still respects him and accepts him for what he is. I've always loved characters like that (Gonzo, Kramer, DJ Pauly D, Pretty much every character except for Liz Lemon on 30 Rock, etc.)

My favorites growing up were "Muppet Christmas Carol" (although looking back, the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come is fucking terrifying, and that part where Caine is singing along with the projection of his past fiancee's breakup song while blubbering like a baby is kinda heavy for what's ostensibly a KID'S MOVIE) and…

Calvinist, they do their Hanukka shows in Jersey almost every year, but other than that they don't play Jersey all that often. I know that they usually record down South, I dunno if somehow that affects their touring schedule or something?

If they WERE going to NYC, on the other hand, you would, what? Be forced to attend at gunpoint?

I just gooped all over my keyboard.

Neckbeard, what you're saying is basically that Martha Stewart is the real life Betty Draper? That totally makes sense.

Climb into this sack and call me daddy!

His bad performance was all a conspiracy orchestrated by the Hollywood Star Whackers, Animal Division.

I hate to admit it, but Lobsters just straight up made me laugh out loud.