I don't understand how movies like this get made. Someone wrote this script, then someone with lots of money said, "HILARIOUS! Let's do this!"

"the real attraction is watching an actor in old-man makeup whip out his balls in public."

A remake of "Carrie"? Meh.

What about all the Nazi bondage porn he did in Europe before he immigrated? Oops, I've said too much.

I buy drugs from Arnold then make fun of his movies! 'MERICA!

Great picture! I'm hearing:

"Well honey, there's an original thought buried waaaay down deep inside that's struggling to get out. Now finish your Dianabol and go to the gym."

GODDAMNIT YOU'RE FIRED TOO!

Good point. I obviously need to spend more time in bars.

Chris Elliot has another series? And I'm just hearing about it now? Who the fuck is responsible for telling me things like this? GODDAMNIT YOU'RE FIRED!

They were fighting in that scene? Thanks, I had no idea.

Oh come on, there's ALWAYS room for hate.

Fuck yeah! And gooder writtingism! Need more of that!

Wouldn't it be easier to just review the Auto-tune software? 

Isn't this just a remake of "Saturday Night Fever" minus disco?

Not if you define "stellar" as hot gas surrounded by cold emptiness.

Possibly, but it came out in March. If you still notice it next month, then yes it counts. Next?

"Likely to be noticed by filmgoers six months from now?" Just out of curiosity and no fair using the InterWebs, can anyone name a comedy that came out 6 months ago? Anyone? Are these kinds of films really intended to be enshrined in eternity? Discuss.

1 Gun: The Beginning

"the quintet is still intact and seemingly stronger than ever"