Online thesauri try to tell me a synonym for "parlour" is "cheap all-inclusives you have to try!" and "one weird trick the celebs use to get those waistlines down".

You're fat AND bald? I'm sorry for teasing earlier, you poor guy.

Ha! Stoopid baldos!

Just don't mention vaginas. They hate vaginas here, even in the following context: "a rose looks like a vagina". Vagina is an obviously offensive word.

Yeah but some people like them with pineapple on them. That's disgusting!

Actually, as such movies would be sequels to the original trilogy yet prequels to the movie currently in question, they are neither entirely sequels nor prequels. Such movies are technically referred to as Nie-quels or, the more colloquial spelling, Nyquils.

Actually they took it comparatively easy on you. I think they were too busy trying to make stupid puns about sand, cheese and cocaine.

TVDW: "I leave my house very rarely".

Not a sound plan. It is a little-known fact that law schools have access to ample legal resources. They should be able to easily counter suits from unemployed drunken lawyers who probably don't even have access to law libraries and may not even have their own fancy lawyering robes.

Liked for comment/avatar synergy.

Still not very badass.

I didn't read this preposterously long article or the numerous surely boring comments, so could someone please let me know if anyone has yet referenced the extremely hairy arms of the gentleman in that picture? With arms so hairy it is very dangerous to be handling flames. Presumably this is the explanation for the…

It'd better not be. That fucker was supposed to be up here an hour ago to help me install the drivers for my new label maker.

You philistine! It's a modern art installation about the inherent emptiness of modern life.

ah… my wife believed in both and also supported the death penalty when we started dating 20 years ago. No one had ever challenged her on either before me and the ideas didn't last long. Glad I didn't let those things drive me off.

I didn't have a TV back before it was cool not to have a TV. Now I not only have a TV, I have completely surrounded myself with them. Every room of my house. But they only play films from my Criterion collection. With the sound off. Mandarin sub-titles. If you don't enjoy films in this way then that is a dealbreaker…

Will you two stop your bickering!

I missed that line because I was busy telling my wife about what a cool word Jabroni is, and also what it means.

But now my quippy rejoinder makes no sense. Curse you Spielbergo!

I think you may be confused about the definition of the word "bad". Unless you mean it in the Michael Jackson sense.