Dammit, the pun thread is below.

Yes you may have gotten into your date's famous bowl.

Well, yes, if she beats me up and I go to the hospital, our prom night will certainly be one we both remember.

"Hippogriffs are dangerous! The mandrakes are going to kill someone!"

And that's a print. We're all done here.

WHERE'S THE DAMN CORKSCREW??!

Nice

I've never seen the new Manchurian Candidate, but AV Club gave it a good review as well as a "Watch This."

I always thought "drowning" was enough to make him angry.

It's not just a problem with horror movies. The idea that mystery and/or ambiguity are good things is lost on many filmmakers.

Man speaks with his nosecock

I'm gonna use your tongue to paint my boat.

* Bear sees Bonnie Grape, laments missed opportunity

http://i.imgur.com/Q5bKyAt.jpg

This is the best news I've heard all week.

Black students? At Hogwarts?

I can't understand how that place hasn't been sued into a smoldering hole in the ground.

And he's dead. Besides, Dzhokhar was still an active participant and had plenty to do with causing it.

Watches

Freddy Kruger has a nicer ass than I remember.