Way back in the GameCube era, I spent a lot of time imagining how the Mario universe could translate into film noir, my other obsession of the time. I can't remember a single idea I had, so I'd bet that I didn't really come up with anything that great.

The entire soundtrack of Donkey Kong: Tropical Freeze. I believe I remarked at some point during each level "wow, the music in this level is fantastic!" to the point where the praise lost all meaning and it became a running gag with me and my girlfriend. I'm also loving the soundtrack of Earthbound all over again as I…

I had the exact opposite reaction to the concept of 12 Reasons: if I put it on, no matter what song I start from, I wind up listening right through to the end!

I'm sort of cramming a bunch of different statements together, but here's "Nintendo fans only want Just Dance":

Oh, the cop thing is ridiculous on Wahlberg's part. Let's not let the guy be a cop. Standards for cops in the US are low enough already!

It's weird… there are plenty of comedians whose work I've enjoyed despite disagreeing with their views, but something about Burr just rubs me the wrong way. Maybe I should watch his new special, if only to better articulate what it is about the guy that bugs me!

Nope! The system doesn't work! But the system doesn't work because of all the people who can't benefit from it in this way, not because of the people who can.

It's entirely possible that I spend too much time arguing with law-n-order types on the Internet and that that's coloring my reading of these pieces!

I would also love it if he did that, and it's a shame that he isn't at this point. But, like you said, it's ridiculous that he can't get that restaurant license!

Hell, I'll agree with that. Mark Wahlberg should totally do that.

But isn't that what he's doing in that 2006 interview quoted above? Talking about how he couldn't sleep at night until he felt like he was giving something back and genuinely being a better person? They're mocking the very idea of expressing remorse in this very post!

This is a real problem in the existing pardon system, since obviously politicians (mostly rich, white guys who have spent their lives in a culture of favour dealing) are way more likely to give pardons to other rich, white guys as favours as they are to use their pardon power to address iniquities in the system (man,…

I have that issue, too. But that's not the objection these AV Club pieces have been expressing. And I don't think the best way to address the iniquities in the system is by getting outraged about Mark Wahlberg getting a pardon. Get outraged about all the people who aren't getting pardons!

No, probably people should apply for a pardon and have that considered by whatever relevant authorities.

Oh yeah, let's definitely not let the guy become a cop. But it seems like the HR department at the Police Station should be able to manage that without the full force of the law. I mean, felons have a hard time getting a job at McDonald's!

Look, Mark Wahlberg, being a rich guy who isn't necessarily the coolest, is a poor example, but does the AV Club really want to stand by the principle that people should face the multitude of restrictions that are placed on felons in the US for their entire lives for things they did when they were teenagers?

I still hope he doesn't get Alzheimer's, though. That would probably be pretty tough on Eminem.

Oh no, they abandoned that policy about a year later due to pressure from the NDP (our social democratic party) with a grandfathered date that my grandmother missed by about a month. The system is more socialized now, and that's a damn good thing. I can't imagine being a working age adult and trying to support your…

Oddly enough, that's sort of why I didn't get any inheritance from my other grandmother: here in Nova Scotia, the policy at the time was "oh, you need to be admitted to a care facility? Fair enough, but the government is going to take literally everything you've ever had to defray the cost of you spending the last few…

Me too!