CCH POUNDER

The problem is that you see people going around, flaunting their geographic landmarks, drinking Cristal out of their Euphrates or tipping strippers in Grand Canyons, and then you want something to show off too. Pretty soon you're sneaking off into the Indian night with a cartoonish plan to jack the Taj Mahal just to…

The clock repair bills alone must be staggering.

If I were a rich man I'd hunt hobos until one of them, played by Ice T, fought back and then I don't remember the end of that movie. People died and there was an explosion or two, I'm guessing. Anyway, that's what I'd do if I were a rich man!

Yeah, provided they're not dead or all gunked up with AIDS.

Neither has the frame to have any longevity as a prison bitch. I imagine that after only about 16 months they'd resemble used up sponges: sopping wet and full of holes.

Well, would you have believed that either Ben Stiller or Matthew Broderick made it out of prison alive?

Drowning Mona

Well, the Horse Bible specifically condemns caressing the Earthly remains of the dead (#4 on the Ten Horse Commandments). I'm sure this poor soul is galloping around horse heaven in duress, winnying and stamping it's hooves instead of playing the equine harp and floating gently on hay clouds.

As the resident expert in horseology, I'd be more than happy to field your questions on horse AIDS. The risk of infection for horse AIDS is relatively low for just straight corpse-play, although it should be said that Michael Stipe contracted horse AIDS in a similar manner after a barn orgy with Misters Ed 1 through 4…

I had a similar idea using the eviscerated body of John Candy to express my love for "Going Berserk."

Back when I could get absolutely shitfaced on Sparks at work.

Like a windsock no one wants to see any more.

I think I heard it creak.

Mansun, Pulp, Suede, Blur… ahhhhh

Yeah, you're right. Sorry everybody. 

This is all in reaction to ripping on a band that you feel has been ripped on enough? Funny, until you explicitly said that, no one would have ever guessed that that was your motivation. I would have thought you were just really, really wanting to hear some penis descriptions. But point taken, next time I'll make sure…

That's a lot of words for an Irishman. Good job! I'll let you get back to flicking your pud around in a whiskey drenched rage now.

Sorry, Slough Hilton. Irish people are really scary and U2 is a good band deserving of respect and admiration. Now let's make out, tough guy-style.

I'd imagine she'd be exactly like her "character" in Ironman 2: constantly whining and/or hen-pecking whoever is around.