So did your mom's boyfriend ever stop calling you that?

That's not a childhood photo of Harvey Weinstein?

Eh, I've got toothpicks and I don't talk a whole lot. I figure I'm covered.

John Williams is scoring this installment.

Phyllis Diller-Nugent is right!

He does that shit on purpose!

Neeeeeeiiiiiiigh!

On the internets it's called "disemvowelment".

What the hell is going on in here, I'm freaking out, you guys.

Chicks are the worst, bro. Fuck chicks. (Not like that, I mean it in the other way, the way that means they're stupid.)

I think you have to say his name three times.

To sum up: fuck this book.

This sounds like something Charlie Kelly would hallucinate and scribble illegibly in his Dram Bok.

Nah, if it was Sims, wouldn't it be more like, "I'm gonna cut your throat, you devilishly handsome bastard!"?

Stop crying, you sniveling ass. Stop your nonsense! 

I'm gonna get one of those guitars that are, like, double guitars, you know?

Hats off to you, Chico.

Or at least team him up with Kevin Bacon for a buddy cop movie.

Mildly irritating? Is America's favorite Hamm starting to lose its glaze?

Skittles promotes a mingling of colors I just can't get behind.