Nah, he's their dad.

Oh, yeah. Mike Hagerty as the cop was awesome, especially when he was describing how Santa fell to the ground: "with a bottle of muscatel in each hand."

Married with Children

Because you fell asleep, or because your childhood was tragically cut short?

Is being bald really worse than wearing what appears to be a sheepdog's ass on your head? Is it?

We're being neither catty nor clever. We're just trying to keep up with the AV Club sausage fest.

Try getting a reservation at Dorsia now, you fucking stupid bastards!

You said "Christian Bale" when I think you meant to say "that".

The scene where Flanders checks himself into the mental hospital and requests being dragged away screaming would go together so wonderfully with audio of Walt's crotch-grabbing "RESTRAIN THIS!"

"Thank you for coming! I'll see you in hell!" does.

Everybody knows that Hot-Nuts was Hot-Lips' older brother.

Ahhhh, this is how you know it's Christmas.

"YOU'RE China!"

I never really understood how getting hit in the head with a couple of tennis balls would cause Kramer to fall into a coma

I'd kind of like to ask Edward Hermann what the fuck, Ed?!, but looking at his IMDb page, it looks like he's no stranger to shitty movies.

Nobody's going to make the obvious mom joke? Christ, OK:

I didn't even think of that until now. Man. I'd be so easily led into the woods.

She was just showing paisan pride. Don't be such a hatah.

Ah, damn it. Never mind.

I read it. It's scary. /Carmela