BITCHES AND LOUBOUTINS OR HOWEVER YOU SPELL IT!

FUCKING STACKED … with acting talent!

Whoa, my tropical drink just melted in my hand.

I'm with you, Calvin. But to be fair, I think they could have easily smurfed this up even if it had been set entirely in Smurf Village.

And yet, somehow, I can remember *which* three numbers 29 years later. Weird.

Also, for a while when I was 3, I referred to the Renaissance Center in Detroit as "the 609 building" because "Jenny (867-5309)" was playing on the radio when we drove by it, and I could only remember three of the numbers.

WHY SHOULD I WORRY? WHY SHOULD I CARE?

Sadly, Hallmark does not make a "Sorry my ex raped me while I was asleep and handcuffed to the bed" card. At least not at the three stores I went to.

There are starving Juggalos in downstate Illinois!

And many are the dead men …… too silent ……… to be real
"Canadian Railroad Trilogy," Gordon Lightfoot

I was waiting and waiting for someone to make that joke, Hipster, and then it finally happened. Thank you, sir.

II > VI > IV > III > I > V

Never mind. I was thinking of Merrill.

Hey, Dave Barry! Remember me? I was the 8-year-old at your book signing in Michigan in 1987 and you accused my mother of negligent parenting for letting me read your columns!

Mirrors
Why is everybody so obsessed with Chuck Lorre looking at himself in the mirror. (By "everybody" I mean "Charlie Sheen and Roseanne.")

Plus she paid billions of dollars to executives using the TARP bailout money!

The only "Just The Way You Are" that matters is Billy Joel's.

Look, chief, the man's name is Fiasco. Did you really expect him to discreetly do things by the book?

Well you can't be too careful when it comes to Sheen-blocking, can you?

He did singlehandedly destroy the most popular show on television.