As a vegetarian, I must add that there's nothing wrong with hunting for food.

Therefore, Trix are to heroin what Kix are to methadone.

Pfft. White ash of gtfo!

Indeed.

workshed.

Hey Weird Al, can you hear me? You should totally do a parody of Nirvana's Rape Me called "meme me".

Takin' it to the streets.

banana comb.

♫Summer Glau, makes me feel…uh, blau? Rollin' through the snowdrifts in my plow.♫

I'm a vegetarian who gets a craving for a big mac, every few years, and I have to make a knock-off at home. It's the same principle at work here, only for people who don't watch or condone TMZ. I mean, they gotta scratch that itch too, sometimes, the itch that says they should take personally the private business of…

The tragedy is that puns are fueled by your contempt. And by tragedy, I, of course, mean hilarity.

I like the hatesong column. Especially when the hate is hard to muster, and it goes completely off topic. That's when it's the best. Just once, they should forget to talk about the song at all, and talk about whats for lunch. It'd be frickin' transcendent, man!

wa-da-tah to the shama cow, my damie.

Hence the name, call girls?

I'm more of a Hardcastle than a McCormick.

You're not wrong, Walter. You're just an asshole.

Yeah, but they don't know how gaping you said it.

Mark a "T" in the crust, too, so I don't accidentally get chicken. Darn it!

The debasement of an entire concept is a lot to put on one celebrity, especially if that celebrity isn't Pauly Shore.

So, pizza is a communist plot to trick us into sharing, and thinking collectively? I knew it! I'm definitely ordering Thai tonight.