Ha-hah! Silly bookstores. My public library has a huge graphic novel/manga section that I can read for FREE!!! SOCIALISM TRIUMPHS AGAIN!!!

Isn't a Ninja… an Assassin… so it's like "Assassin Assassin"… ?

NAY! All games must be linear and easily classified into a single genre and play style!!! Innovation or creativity on the part of developer or player be of the DEVIL!

Don't order the clam chowder.

Uh-oh… someone made James Cameron I mean WOW really upset…

Ya, totally ripped off the floating rocks in Nagrand and all over Outland in World of Warcraft… um… err… NERDS! Ya.

So, will this be for the 360 or PS3? Maybe even the Wii, looking at the graphics?

Wasn't he Shark-boy?

In some classical vampire lore, male vampires do attempt to mate with their mortal wives. The issue of such a union is then half vamp, half humey (ala Blade). These Damphirs then devote their lives to hunting down vampire daddy.

You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner fucking year! I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." Alright? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay!

Dude, don't get your Charmins twisted in a knot.

Then you'll have to install the right drivers so the comedy files will work, and even then it'll probably be incompatible with your current hardware. And god forbid it goes into "*Sleep mode" (*read "Coma mode").

But will the manatees be able to come up with material for the script fast enough if they do it live? Also, will they just stock the audience with everyone who was ever on TV from 1976-1992, just to be ready for the non-sequiters?

I've found if you don't want the kids coming around, just give out toothbrushes. Word spreads fast that your house is the toothbrush house, so you don't have to invest in a lot of them. Also, you get a lot of free toilet paper the next day.

Originality
There's no way any other floundering publication would think of something like this, especially not Maxim in April 2004.

I only want to go see it so that when the word "Werewolf" is said for the first time, I can shout the obligatory "THERE WOLF!" joke. My subsequent death at the hands of menopausal twitards should be brutal and swift.

True. Keep Officer Barbrady away from Stephanie Meyers books, lest he turn his service revolver on himself. I was at least able to get through to the end of Atlas Shrugged. Both attempts at Twilight ended in blissful failure.

I dunno. Seeing her sad… it's like a delicious elixir. Ah, yes, her misery sustains me. Schadenfreud is lovely.

As long and there's no fucking Swedes or Scotsmen, yes.

Nobody I know over 50 is watching Mad Men. It's like they'd rather hang onto their Leave It to Beaver memories than be confronted with all the stuff they liked that is now wrong (like singing, "My Old Kentucky Home" in blackface).