Yeah, we suck

I prefer my grits on someone else's plate.

Thermals make for poor narrative.

I was going to join in on this shameful pun thread but my conscience balk-aned.

He'll be too busy staring in that Michael Cera biopic.

Winter's Bone?
Because she was really good in that.

But we wanted PITT. THE. ELDER!!!

I got a downvote for that. Nice to see that some people still take a hardline against heart theft.

I hope someone got fired over that mistake

FUN FACT: As I've told my IRL friends, I've been living with the woman for 26 years and I've only even heard her fart ONCE. I honestly don't know how she does it.

Oh yeah, that great big bathtub at Me and the Mrs first place together was the scene of some of my all time favorite memories. Ah 1987, what a great year.

Ah but how do you you explain trough urinals, theologically speaking that is?

We don't pee in front of each other either. I guess that makes us repressed.

In my experience One of the secrets to a long, happy relationship is to never, ever talk about who else you'd like to fuck, no matter how badly you'd really, really like to.

Why? Does that make you uncomfortable?

Fuck if I know. I learned grammar in the New York City school system of the 1970s.

It's called the: KEEP YOUR WOMENFOLK AWAY FROM DAVID BYRNE

Um, Annie, you got a little something up there… no, right up on top.. It's attached? REALLY? Shit Annie… well, still love you anyway you talented weirdo.

And people claim America's educational system is hopelessly broken.

I think you mean eye-socket fucking. I mean, otherwise the mechanics just don't work out.