We'll die free! YEAHHH!

Would you PLEASE SIGN MY YEAAARRRBOOK!

I don't know why everyone's focusing on the cat. It sounds like she threw everything she had at this guy. The whole "kitten kaboodle."

manifesto. . . read my manifesto. . . I've written a manifesto
Ted Kaczynski as a contestant on Singled Out, with Colbert as That Guy Who Hosted Singled Out.

"this is not a real moustache"
Does anyone remember this skit? I think it was one of the last skits that Norm MacDonald appeared in as a cast member, and it was cut out of the hour long syndicated version. Sarah Michelle Gellar was the host. The premise was that it was some "Tiger Beat" type show, and Norm…

"they want to murder you in a well."

In my opinion, The New Guy is the prime example of this kind of movie.

So it's settled. God is a smokin' hot, well-dressed hermaphrodite.

Also, Schmooty, I find it interesting that you inverted the first letter of my username twice. It's like some kind of message board dyslexia.

Interesting point, Schmooty. Yet, while Seinfeld himself has been discredited, I do think that the "Bee Movie" promos provided compelling evidence that there is no God at all. Or if there is a God, it's definitely the old-school vengeful God.

There's the real philosophical debate. If God exists, and human beings are created in his image and likeness, would he or she be hot?

I thought this thread was interesting at first. Then I got impatient, so I skipped to the end to find out which of the posters on a snarky pop culture website had resolved the free will vs determinism debate, explained the practical implications of this earth-shattering revalation, and detailed the catastrophic…

Herschel Walker
What about Herschel Walker's dissociative identity disorder? Did they talk about this at all? Will we get to hit the reality-show jackpot by enjoying a washed-up celebrity struggle with multiple personalities while participating in a TRUMP charity bachelor auction or other ridiculous challenge?

Video store memories. . .
I was at Blockbuster one time, walking past a section of new releases. Two women were looking at the back of a box for some movie, that one had pulled off the shelf. As they studied it, they both looked up at each other and cooed. . . "Oooh, Tom Berenger." Mind you, this was the late 90's,…

I can't even see where the knob is!

Prison Wine's apartment: because sometimes you need to hit bottom before you can admit you have a problem.

Let the quotes begin. . .
First I blow him, then I poke him.

Prison Wine's apartment: "I'm much more relaxed since they stopped making 'To Catch a Predator'

"bump up the nuts" may also be the note most commonly shouted at actors on a Jerry Bruckheimer movie.

and, likewise, you should use "Mounds" for female genitalia.